Are You on an Ego Trip?

Relax… Everyone Knows About it!

There are some people who get caught up in a selfish and what we call ‘egocentric’ lifestyle. The egocentric person expects life to serve and gratify him and acknowledges no greater authority than his own wants. He tries to control and manipulate his own environment and especially others. He may appear to be strong, but it is a demonic kind of power, not to be confused with true and soulful strength. The person with true strength can afford to give up his egocentricity; the person with a selfish and weak ego falls back upon manipulation to maintain his sense of power. (Sandford)

Fritz Kunkel, a Jungian analyst spoke of four typical egocentric types:

(1) Star: The Star absolutely has to be the center of attention. We’ve all seen folks at parties, classes, and meetings who maintain their egocentricity by demanding the limelight, adulation, and glory. Stars have to shine.

(2) Clinging Vine: The Clinging Vine seems to strike a humble pose. These folks become overly dependent and cling to others. It is an egocentric attempt to avoid a responsible life. At the extreme their life adaptation becomes parasitical.

(3) Turtle: The Turtle has tremendous difficulties relating to people, he pulls inside a shell so no one can reach him. His selfishness takes the form of hiding from life and relationships, living encased in a psychological armor.

(4) Nero: The Nero wants to dominate and his egocentricity takes the form of lust for direct power and control. We know that underneath the mask of superiority lie considerable feelings of inadequacy and inferiority.

Below are three ways of overcoming your egocentricity

(A) Meaningful Suffering. Many people, especially in mid-life, go through a ‘night-sea’ journey, or journey through the wilderness. Depression, anxiety and physical symptoms set in. Suffering by itself is no cure; it only cures when we have the right attitude towards it. Psychological symptoms like depression are messages to us, which we need to understand. This we can only do by being courageous and looking inward. At the point the journey into the wilderness becomes a journey deeper into our souls. As we realize we have brought some of our suffering upon ourselves, we make changes and live a much more soulful life.

(B) The Second experience which breaks down our egocentricity is the realization that there is something bigger going on in this universe than our ego. Sometimes when our conscious point of view is severely shaken (divorce, illness, catastrophe, etc.) contact with the spiritual side of the unconscious is possible. When people travel through the wilderness and truly face themselves, a nighttime dream, a vision, or an intuitive insight can begin to change their lives and egocentricity.

(C) A Third way of changing egocentricity is through service and caring for someone other than ourselves. This must happen, especially in mid-life. For some, it is the resurfacing from the abyss of a mid-life crisis. We do this by giving back to our community, our profession and to nature without selfish gains.

Peter Milhado © 2010

This article was also published at www.OjaiandVenturaVIEW.com